Uncommon Misconception

Swampbutt Update

Because I'm sure you're all dying to know.

All of the various cultures and samples came back negative.  Which is good.  Save the fact that the swampbutt persists.  On Monday we stopped the Prilosec to see if its a reaction to that.  So far, no change at the business end; but we have seen a resurgence of the reflux symptoms.  I'm going to add Axid back into the mix starting tonight.  But if we don't see an improvement by Monday, we'll probably go back to the Prilosec.

Everyone acknowledges that Caroline's teething is exacerbating this whole issue, if not the root cause.  If it turns out to be solely teething causing such horrid symptoms, well those had better be some impressive chompers, is all I'm sayin'.

Mood Lighting

I'm not positive, but perhaps watching all of the following movies in less than 24 hours contributed a bit to my overall mood the past few days:

Reign Over Me
A very well-written and well-acted movie about loss.  I love Don Cheadle, and seeing Adam Sandler in a dramatic role was eerie, but effective.  Even Todd liked it, and his take on sad movies usually runs along these lines: "Great.  Now we should watch some kittens being drowned just to complete the evening."  There is a happy ending, though, so it's not completely depressing.  Or it is, but then picks you up and gives you a pat on the back.

Catch a Fire
Nothing like the torture of young children and women to bring your mood down a tad.  I missed the first part of the movie, but the cinematography and acting was incredibly engaging.  Plus, I could listen to the musical South African language all day.  I kept wanting to walk away because the subject matter (like any involving torture, hatred, racism, or intolerance) was so ragged, but I couldn't.  There is also a good deal of resolution, if not outright happiness, at the end of the film.

Munich
Apparently, one of the HBOs was having a depressing politically-themed movie marathon, as right after Catch a Fire came Munich.  Again, I find the theme of hatred begetting hatred, begetting more hatred astoundingly scary.  And this time, there really is no resolution, as we all know.  I find it even more creepy when the whole revenge plot is masterminded by a kindly gray-haired grandma.  And the final scene of Eric Bana's character making love to his wife, mixed in with images of the hostage killings, well that's just... just... it gives me the heebie jeebies, to say the least.

Any other depressing films I can screen for you?  Can you tell I'm dancing around posting about my real thoughts and feelings as of late?  I'll get there.  I think.

Five Years

Five. Years.

I cried last night as I did the math three times because I just couldn't believe it.

We love you, Thomas, and there still isn't a day that goes by without thoughts of you and how you forever changed our hearts.

Just Can't Right Now

Up until a few days ago I thought I might make it through a November without big thoughts on grief and loss.  I know - silly of me.

Lately it seems there is a lot of "dealing" and "coping" going on in the blog world.  And as tempting as it was to think that I'd be too happy or busy to go there myself, it seems that reality requires that I spend a few days reflecting and processing not only my losses, but those of my loved ones and friends.

I have things to say.  I think.  But not yet.  Right now, I just need to be still some more.

Both Ends of the... Baby?

Operation stool collection was about as much fun as I thought it might be when I posted about it.  Attempting to trap liquid poo that more closely resembles something you'd clean out of a fish tank, all while packing you whole family for an eight-hour road trip and tying up the loose ends on five business projects... well, it's not fun.

If there's anyone out there ingenious enough to craft an infant poo funnel, there's money it it is all I'm sayin'.

A visit to the pediatrician on Monday yielded some interesting information.  Namely, she doesn't think it's a milk allergy (which, if I'm being frank, is a huge relief since one of my Mom's mashed potato recipes calls for butter AND sour cream AND cream cheese).  She does think something's amiss.  She's testing her for all sorts of cooties and we may take her off Prilosec and switch her to something else to see if its a reaction to the medicine.  She also noted that Caroline's teething.  I was shocked.  She's been drooling like a monster and stuffing he fingers in her mouth (and mine whenever she can), but I kept reminding myself that Hannah didn't get teeth until she was 8-months-old.  When the pediatrician felt her gums and said she could feel the little nubbins, I was amazed.

So now she has undiagnosed swamp-butt AND teething.  FUN!  (I am thankful, though [thankful! get it!] that she's still managing to be so darned agreeable whenever she's not actively pooping or gnawing.)

Yesterday we finished packing, picked up Hannah from Mrs. Barbara's, dropped off the poo (I'm dubious about whether they'll have enough to test), and hit the road at about 3:30.  It took us 8.5 hours, putting us here at midnight.  As road trips with a toddler and an infant go, it was a big success.  We stopped once to nurse; once to fuel up, eat, put the kids in jammies and nurse again; and the once more for final fuel, more nursing, and a blow-out diaper.

We settled in  easily and everyone slept well. Tonight we're aiming for early bedtimes for the grownups because we're wiped out.

Tomorrow, my mom, who rocks, has prepared the most easy Thanksgiving in our family history.  Everything is prearranged.  Nothing but thawing and popping things in and out of the oven.  (By the way, you should check out my flickr account and look at my parents' anniversary pictures for a neat retrospective and a pretty good laugh... the 70s and 80s were not kind.)

So this year, I am wishing you all a warm and fuzzy Thanksgiving with smiles that outweigh your frowns.

Not for the Faint of Heart

I'm about to embark on a mission that requires saran wrap, a diaper, and a spoon.

Wish me luck.

A Good Problem to Have

I like it when the universe hands you a pretty, neatly wrapped answer to big questions.  Case in point, my dilemma over potentially leaving freelance.  After the job offer temporarily disappeared, clients began ringing me up (I feel British today) left and right.  I know have at least five projects on my plate that must be completed before we leave for our Thanksgiving vacation on Tuesday.  And then there are two more new clients after that.  So, for the moment at least, we're in the "make hay" mode.  And it's great when there's so much hay to be made.

I love that I've got more than I can say grace over... interesting clients who are doing innovative things and changing the world in their own way, two amazing daughters who bring me to tears with love on a daily basis (okay, sometimes the tears are brought on by something other than love, but still), a husband who is  completely helpful and supportive*, and a daycare situation for Hannah that makes me happy rather than guilt-ridden.

As is my custom, my blogging may suffer a bit while I pound out these deadlines in a caffeine-driven blur.  But I'm still here and I still love you, so please don't leave!!!  ahem.

To keep busy in the interim, can anyone suggest a site or recipes or tips for cutting out down some dairy from my diet?  Caroline has vastly improved with the Maalox.  Vastly.  But she's got some pretty vicious algae-green poo that bothers her as it's happening.  And frankly, being shat upon routinely in the wee hours of the night bothers me, too.  I thought I might try to eliminate some dairy and then see if Thanksgiving blows it all to hell.

P.S. Thank you for your sweet compliments on the blog's new decor.

*He bought me a card the other day thanking me for all I do with the girls and work and telling me I'm doing a good job!  Maybe my pep talk last month worked! 

I Feel Pretty

Like the new digs?!  I love, love, love the new design.  I always love Aitch's work, but this one, it's so pretty it hurts.  Man, I really cannot believe how lucky I am to have those two beautiful creatures.

... What the hell am I going to do when they become teenagers?

Taking Names and Kickin' Ass!

Today is one of those days.  One of those days where I'm on top of it. 

Hannah is at Mrs. Barbara's Academy of Stay Out of My Hair, Caroline is asleep, Todd's out with clients, and I'm hittin' on all cylinders.  I conduct and interview and then compose a great bio as soon as I hang up the phone.  I read a creative brief, and poof! Instant, spot-on ad copy.  On days like these I feel like an orchestral conductor, gathering all the key components and arranging them in a way that seems near effortless, creating a perfect opus.

Granted, I have not yet heard feedback on these projects.  But I'm feeling it.  They're good.  They hit the right note.

Damn, I love days like this.

An Answer, of Sorts

My would-be boss at the educational publishing company e-mailed me this morning.  It seems the position has been put on hold indefinitely.

While this is a bummer for her, it might actually work out best for me.  They still need me to do all the same projects.  And now I can do them at my freelance rate and from home.  Yes, the job perks would have been nice, but I'm hoping they decide to re-open the position sometime after the first of the year, when Caroline is older and we can think about things more logically.

In the meantime, I've got lots of big projects underway.  I'm going to talk with Hannah's daycare provider to see if we can send her to Mrs. Barbara's Academy of Stay Out of My Hair for three full days a week for the remainder of the year.