... she catches me off guard.
Last night, as I was tucking Hannah in, I noticed her sweet little face twisting up into her about-to-cry expression. I asked her what was wrong. "I just miss my brothers," she answered.
"Oh sweetie, I know you do. But they're watching over you and looking down over all of us."
"I know you always say that, but I never see them."
I explained that maybe she could see them in her dreams. And that maybe if we both prayed she would see them that very night. So she asked me to say the prayer ("I'm really too little," she said) and I left the room - keeping it together by the sheerest of margins.
Though it seemed to come out of nowhere, I think her thoughts may have been prompted by the evening she'd just spent playing with two boy friends. She must wonder, on some level, what it would be like to have her brothers here.
It's so easy and tempting to get all wound up in the "me" of grief. Too easy to forget how the others around us suffer.
I'm glad I'm in a place where I can help her deal with moments like that, without burrowing back down into that place of despair. And I'm glad that I could fall asleep saying the very same prayer, and looking forward to those moments when I do see them in my dreams.
Last night, as I was tucking Hannah in, I noticed her sweet little face twisting up into her about-to-cry expression. I asked her what was wrong. "I just miss my brothers," she answered.
"Oh sweetie, I know you do. But they're watching over you and looking down over all of us."
"I know you always say that, but I never see them."
I explained that maybe she could see them in her dreams. And that maybe if we both prayed she would see them that very night. So she asked me to say the prayer ("I'm really too little," she said) and I left the room - keeping it together by the sheerest of margins.
Though it seemed to come out of nowhere, I think her thoughts may have been prompted by the evening she'd just spent playing with two boy friends. She must wonder, on some level, what it would be like to have her brothers here.
It's so easy and tempting to get all wound up in the "me" of grief. Too easy to forget how the others around us suffer.
I'm glad I'm in a place where I can help her deal with moments like that, without burrowing back down into that place of despair. And I'm glad that I could fall asleep saying the very same prayer, and looking forward to those moments when I do see them in my dreams.
